Stepcoupling: Creating and Sustaining a Strong Marriage in Today’s Blended Family, by Susan Wisdom and Jennifer Green, is a remarriage manual. It addresses the adult couple relationship in a stepfamily because that relationship is so easily torn apart by the demands of raising each other’s kids, dealing with ex-spouses, and more.
People have no idea what it will be like going from a romantic twosome to a complex system of adults and kids with different histories, styles, and values. What a shock it can be! Stepcoupling has saved many marriages by telling real life stories and offering tips and strategies for dealing with stepcoupling and blended family issues.
What People Are Saying?
This an excellent book for step-family orientation. It is also provides superb information about what a marriage should be.
Wonderful and Inspiring Book… Especially the Last Two Chapters! This is a wonderful and valuable book for anyone currently in a stepfamily or contemplating a remarriage with children involved. The last two chapters stick out in my mind the most, especially the second to the last Chapter – Empowering Everyone. The stories and insights shared throughout the book are very honest and inspiring. The fact that the author wrote this book based on her own personal experience and was willing to share so much of her own struggle and challenges in her stepfamily, make it very believable and easy to read. It’s nice to get advice from someone who has actually been there and has experienced some of the same things you are struggling with.
I would say that I can relate to many of the situations covered in this book and chuckled when I ran across some that I had also gone thru but didn’t know how to handle. This book is easy to read and very understandable and gives me hope and a new perspective on my situation. I would encourage anyone thinking of creating a stepfamily to read this book and to hang onto it – you’ll need it along the way. My husband is reading it now!
Sharon Sedgwick (Woodland Hills, CA)
The Best One Out There! I am a clinical social worker in private therapy practice. I purchased this book three years ago to help a family with whom I was working in therapy. Since then, I have quoted the highlighted passages from my own copy numerous times in sessions, and have loaned the book out so many times that a client finally bought me a newer copy, as a gift for helping her family so much. The best thing about this book is how it highlights the couple relationship. Blended family couples finally have support in creating the foundation for success.
Many texts about blending families and helping children deal with divorce focus on how the “children should come first”, to the exclusion of what is necessary to keep the adults healthy. Children’s needs are certainly paramount, but often that belief feeds a system wherein parents are almost forced to create a triangulated situation between their biological children and their new spouse. This book clearly explains how to avoid that triangulation, and to keep the power where it belongs: with the two adults in the home, as a team. As a structural family therapist, this book helps me to show parents what we mean when we talk about the “executive power system” in the family.
In order to have healthy blended families, it is absolutely essential to have a strong parent couple in each family. This book helps the reader with the myths and misconceptions of “step-families”, which are really better termed “blended families”. It gives good suggestions on how to deal with “the exes” – the other parents of the children in your home. It addresses the “yours, mine and ours” issues that come up when blended families add more kids to the family. It also addresses special considerations that need to be made when one parent has died.
The message of hope throughout this book makes it easy to read and truly finish, especially for parents in busy families. The personal stories from parents in blended families give the reader the sense that they are not alone, and that it will get better. I highly recommend this book, for every blended family parent, and every family therapist working with blended families.
Melissa Adams (Grand Island, Nebraska)
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