Holiday post mortem: does this sound familiar?:
It was a good holiday EXCEPT for that one bad incident. It could have been when you lost your temper with your stepchild. Or when you insulted your partner’s ex. When you drank too much. Or burned the casserole. Or when you yelled at your husband, who was just trying to help…
You regret it, and you can’t let it go.
If you can relate to this, here’s my advice:
S_ _ t happens! Try giving yourself a break (for many of us, this takes practice). Everyone does things they regret. The good news is that you can learn something from that nasty experience.
It’s likely that you’re the one suffering the most over the incident. What would it take to lighten up on yourself and the person (or situation) you tangled with? How about ending it in your own mind. Or how about addressing the problem openly after you’ve had a chance to calm down? How about apologizing and making amends? Ask for forgiveness. That starts with forgiving yourself—others will follow in time.
Isn’t it time to turn the record over and begin a new tune?
Make it a great new year.
Susan Wisdom, MA
January 2012